The month of January 2021 has ended and how are you really in this new normal, in the midst of the pandemic? Are you constantly hearing a voice telling you that “This is going to be another terrible year”? Are you trying to start new but somehow you are still holding on to some secrets from the past, and they are catching up with you? Are you already housing and struggling with negativity in your heart but not wanting to worry others?
Harbouring pain within, Speaking “fine” with lips
This is a famous Chinese Idiom referring to people who kept pains and hurts inside them and did not want to be vulnerable to share with others. There are many reasons why this happened. The person might not wish to share, afraid to share or, didn’t know how to share. We are all created to express. Try imagine standing on top of a high mountain and looking down on a very magnificent view below, what would be your response? Some of us would spontaneously said “WOW”. Some of us would just be awestruck and speechless by the scenery. While some would just snapshot it in the mind with a paragraph of narratives, ready to share verbally or in writing. Whatever it is, it is a way one expresses. To express is natural and healthy. Stopping ourselves from expressing is like a blocked water pipe, water could not flow freely; one day the pipe will burst or leak.
What we have experienced in 2020 shown us that there were uncertainties in the future and the fragility of lives. However, it also shown us the power of creativity, collaboration and the adaptive power of the human race. In this new normal, one needs to move from “Me” to “We”. To do so, one needs to know and to be known, to understand and to be understood. That is being vulnerable – a step of bravery. Whatever reasons you had for not sharing what is in your heart, it is time to take courage, face the music and dance! Just decide to be vulnerable, starting from your loved ones. For those who don’t know how, it would be time to seek professional helps from a mentor, counsellor or a coach. I am alone, you are alone; together we are not alone.
Last week, I just had a session with a youth. He was getting depressed due to the online classes, not able to physically hanging out with his friends, the pressure of final year examination (postponed from 2020 to this month) and a recent relationship issue. All these brought pains in his heart and he kept it all within for months. He was able to open up and the “unclogging” started. His bravery brought forth freedom in his life.
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